Meet the witch who uses magic to cast malware out of the system

[Morvotron]

Content source

http://motherboard.vice.com/read/we-talked-to-a-witch-who-casts-viruses-out-of-computers-with-magic

"When nasty viruses infect the computers of folks up in Northern California, Reverend Joey Talley is on it.

The Wiccan witch—who is also an ordained minister through the State of California—not only offers services for people struggling with romantic heartache, depression, and other ailments, she also exorcises viruses from computers.

“No problem is too small, too big, or too weird” is Talley’s motto. Sure, she can do a love spell, but she’d rather face off with ghosts and demons.

To excise such entities out of a machine, she uses a variety of techniques—she might place stones on top of the computer, clear the dark energy by setting an intention with her mind, or cleanse the area around the computer by burning sage. The time it takes to clear these viruses depends on the nefariousness of the entity, she says: sometimes it takes just an hour, other times it can take up to four.

I spoke with Talley to learn more about how she’s used Wiccan witchcraft to build a client base of professionals who want alternative tech support in and around Silicon Valley, and how she silences her critics."


PLEASE, READ THE FULL ARTICLE HERE: We Talked to a Witch Who Casts Viruses Out of Computers With Magic​

 

[Der.Reisende]

Seen that one on German based Heise Security a while ago, awesome share @Morvotron

EDIT: For our German readers: l+f: Probleme mit Computerviren? Ruf die Tech-Hexe!
Hope it's ok to share @Morvotron / @ Mods

 

[SHvFl]

That's what @Umbra needs to try to get rid of skynet on his pc.

 

[Rishi]

I wonder if this would be an interesting way to test malware @illumination @Klipsh

 

[Aleeyen]

Well I can do it better and in less time also, I just need a bucket of water.

 

[cruelsister]

She could cut down on the time it takes with a little Eye of Unicorn powder.

 

[Entreri]

Fools and their money are soon separated.

I would think it would work better in say Utah, where religion/superstition is quite rabid.

 

[Deleted member 178]

That's what @Umbra needs to try to get rid of skynet on his pc.

why get rid ! I made skynet !

 

[jamescv7]

So trying to make a shortcut method to clean your PC, create an epic program and others? Its interesting but definitely weird which probably psychological behavior only. (my view only)

 

[Azure]

Silly witch. That's not how you get rid of viruses. Everyone knows that the best way to fix any computer problems is to take it into the back alley, and blow it to kingdom come with your gun.
Man guns down computer after getting fed up with Blue Screen of Death

 

[Viking]

I thought that I heard all all, but this beats them all

 

[XhenEd]

Is that all she got?
With Umbra Total Security, the malware would wish it never entered the system.

 

[ravi prakash saini]

I am at loss if i should cry or laugh,please help me to decide

 

[illumination]

I bet if you did place a rock "on the system" it could potentially exercise malware, and possibly everything else on it, it would all depend on how Big the rock was and how Hard you placed it on the computer.

 

[DJ Panda]

I tried doing this myself.. I accidently broke my computer screen.

THEY ARE PROFESSIONALS DON'T DO THIS YOURSELF

 

[Morvotron]

I tried doing this myself.. I accidently broke my computer screen.

THEY ARE PROFESSIONALS DON'T DO THIS YOURSELF

You used Illumination's rock tip? Dang!

 

[Mineria]

Maybe I should call that witch...

 

[hjlbx]

She could get a job at Webroot no problem... Vice President of Malware Removal.

For all the instances where journaling & rollback fail...