The RAM issue is not so much how much RAM a particular program uses. It's the aggregate amount of RAM consumed by all installed programs.
The primary issue is how many programs are installed and starting up with Windows.
I see complaints from people that their RAM usage is high or very high. When I check how many programs are installed, I am not surprised to find 50 to 70 programs installed on the system with 40 to 50 or more processes of various types configured to start with Windows. Users often overlook services that are set to automatically start with Windows.
So, it's not the RAM usage that is slowing down Windows - as they have enough RAM installed so that there is not heavy page file swapping - it is all the processes that are started with and running on Windows that are bogging it down. Of course with many installed programs there is higher RAM consumption that can cause its own set of problems if RAM usage is very close to the physical installed RAM amount (pagefile swap causes slowdown). One can run into drive grinding, but I have seen this very little since most systems now have more than 4GB RAM installed.