Tech Support / Questions & Answers

[jenniferatemple]

Many of you may have see some of these before but they're so good I didn't want anyone missing out:

Tech Support ( Questions & Answers )
................................................................................
Tech Support: What kind of computer do you have?
Customer: A white one.
...............................................
.
Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my DVD
out !!!
Tech Support: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure it's really stuck.
Tech Support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.
Customer: No, wait a minute, I hadn't inserted it
yet. It's still on my desk . . . sorry. Thank you.
..............................................
.
Tech Support: Hello. How may I help you?
Male Customer: Hi .. . . I can't print.
Tech Support: Would you click on 'START' for me and . .
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on
me. I'm not Billi Gates!!!

Customer: Good afternoon, this is Martha. I can't
print. Every time I try, it says . . .. 'CAN'T FIND
PRINTER'. I even lifted the printer and placed it
in front of the monitor, but the computer still
says it can't find it!!!

Customer: I have problems printing in red.
Tech Support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah . . . . . .. . . . . thank you.

Tech Support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear that my boyfriend bought for
me at the 7-11 store.
Tech Support: Click on the 'MY COMPUTER' icon on the
left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
..............................................
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech Support: Are you sure your keyboard is plugged
into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech Support: Pick up your keyboard and take ten
steps backwards.
Customer: Okay..
Tech Support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes.
Tech Support: That means the keyboard is not plugged
in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Wait a
moment please. . .. . . . . Ah, that one does work.
Thanks.

Tech Support: Your password is the small letter 'a' as in
apple, a capital letter 'V' as in Victor, and the number '7'.
Customer: Is that '7' in capital letters?

Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
Tech Support: Are you absolutely sure you used the
correct password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure I saw my co-worker do it.
Tech Support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five dots.

Tech Support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape
Tech Support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry . . . Internet Explorer.

Customer: I have a huge problem! My friend has
placed a screen saver on my computer . . . but,
every time I move my mouse, it disappears.

Tech Support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first email.
Tech Support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address,
but how do I get the little circle around it.

Customer: My cup holder has stopped working.
I push the button but it doesn’t come out now.
Tech Support: Computers don’t have cup holders.

A woman customer called the Canon help desk because
she had a problem with her printer.
Tech Support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: No, my desk is next to the door, but that
is a good point. The man sitting next to me is by
a window, and his printer is working fine!

And last, but not least . . .

Tech Support: Okay Bob, press the control and escape
keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the
middle of the screen. Now, type the letter 'P' to bring
up the Program Manager.
Customer: I don't have a 'P'.
Tech Support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean ?
Tech Support: 'P' . . .. on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: I AM NOT GOING TO DO THAT!!!
..............................................
.
This outta make you feel better about your computer skills!

 

[jenniferatemple]

One of my biggest beefs!

Tech Support for most ISPs! I will do everything I can reasonably think of before I call them. Then when I call, one by one they will suggest steps already taken. To often at the end of the call I have not received any help and still need to keep tinkering until I find the problem. Worse, many have a problem with the English language!

Me Just ranting.

 

[aztony]

Tech Support for most ISPs! I will do everything I can reasonably think of before I call them. Then when I call, one by one they will suggest steps already taken.

Techs usually have an ordered system of checks to troubleshoot a given/stated problem. And they go thru that list systematically employing a process of elimination until the problem is found/identified. It may seem pointless to a computer literate user, but you also have to consider the number of clueless people they have to deal with as well. The language thing, well...

 

[jenniferatemple]

Tech Support for most ISPs! I will do everything I can reasonably think of before I call them. Then when I call, one by one they will suggest steps already taken.

Techs usually have an ordered system of checks to troubleshoot a given/stated problem. And they go thru that list systematically employing a process of elimination until the problem is found/identified. It may seem pointless to a computer literate user, but you also have to consider the number of clueless people they have to deal with as well. The language thing, well...

It is REALLY very pointless when you start by telling them what you have already done and like a robot just ask you to do it all again! I don't call them anymore because when they get to the end of the list, the problem is still there. I'd rather spend those hours trying to find an end result. I would understand if I had not said, check, done that, check, done that.... Then I can wait for some kind of upper level support that may take days, I don't dare mention a name but at the end of ten days I learn its ALL AT THEIR END!! I changed ISP that time.

 

[Prorootect]

' You will get a warning message. Click "Yes." '